The Joy of the Season and Grief
When we lose someone we love, our hearts struggle on a daily basis to figure out how to navigate our world without them.
When the holidays roll around, our hearts are on overload because everywhere we turn, we are reminded that this is a time for family, for love, and for being together.
This holiday season will be particularly hard on all grievers because we now have to contend with our broken hearts as well. Your traditions and norms are already being challenged because of our loss, and now we are forced figure out how to spend the holiday.
In the first months after the death of someone important to you, you may struggle with enjoying yourself. Many grieving people are unable to laugh, sing, or celebrate in any way.
The truth is that it is hard enough to be missing them, and now we have to go to a party and pretend we are having fun or enjoying ourselves.
The amount of pain you are currently feeling and the fact that you are missing all the family events does not mean that you do not love them.
We know that your emotions are like a rollercoaster going up and down.
But here’s the deal—it is okay to have a laugh. It is okay to share a story about the one you lost. It is okay to cry when talking about them. All of these are good things and they do not make you a bad person.
It is even okay to go to a family party and enjoy everyone’s company. It your decision which events to attend and which ones not to because the truth is that wherever you go, you will be carrying your broken heart with you.
Do keep this in mind—if you are around people you love you will be able to, we trust, laugh, cry, and even share a jolly story with them.