The Want Vs Need

August 26, 2022

The Need:

Need — require (something) because it is essential or very important rather than just desirable.  The need feels like you will not make it through this pain if you do not have the desired object near you.

In grief there are things that we do because we need them as part of our healing process.  It is not uncommon for us to wear his favorite shirt for 30 days straight.  Because I need to feel his presence in my heart.

VS

The Want

Want — have a desire to possess or do (something); wish for.  I want this shirt.  I have found memories of him in this shirt.

Over time these needs even if they are strange to you. (i.e., not wanting to clean out their hairbrush) will slowly turn into wants.  I want to place his shirt under my pillow as it comforts me.

https://www.facebook.com/groups/hope.heal.recover

 

DOWNLOAD TRANSCRIPT

Related Podcasts

Why Grief Feels So Confusing—And What to Do About It

Why Grief Feels So Confusing—And What to Do About It

Let’s just say it plainly: grief is not just sadness.  It’s not just crying. It’s not just missing someone.  Grief is chaos.  One minute you're sobbing. The next, you feel nothing. Then you're lashing out, then apologizing, then exhausted, then wide awake at 2 AM....

What Grief Steals That No One Talks About

What Grief Steals That No One Talks About

When people talk about grief, they usually talk about the person who died. The relationship. The memories. The love.  But here’s the truth: grief takes more than just your person.  It takes your energy.
It takes your peace.
It takes your sleep.
It takes the sound of...

You’re Allowed to Be Mad

You’re Allowed to Be Mad

The Part of Grief No One Talks About: Rage When most people think about grief, they imagine tears, quiet sorrow, and maybe even a gentle search for meaning. They picture someone mourning in stillness—soft, tender, emotionally broken, but calm. What rarely gets...